Christmas 2010

I sure do wish I were inspired to write something really poignant tonight, but honestly, I am so exhausted from making Christmas smooth for everyone, fixing everybody's favorite everything, and saving a piece of myself in the process - that I am just too dang tired to write anything meaningful.

There were a few moments today that I thought a few really witty things, but they escape me now, much like that jar of pickles that exploded all over the kitchen floor just minutes before I planned to announce that "dinner is served."  Oh yea, I almost forgot the relish tray - Judy surely would have said something if there were no pickles and olives on the table.  She almost had a meltdown at the grocery store when I said we didn't need to buy the black olives this year.  She doesn't like black olives, and I can take them or leave them. With everything else on the table that we know we like, why buy something for just the four of us when none of us care about the ding-dong black olives?  But I do love homemade pickles, and it so happened that Dad ran into Phoebe at Judy's workshop on Thursday and netted a jar of her famous homemade pickles.  Worth having a relish tray, for sure.  Good thing I like the smell of allspice because I smelled like a jar of pickles from 4:45 on today.  The kitchen floor is still sticky.  But the pickles really were worth it - even though we only got to have two each - the rest had to be trashed. 

I made something new for the first time this year:  Kahlua/Chocolate Mousse.  OMG - it was amazing.  A little on the rich side, but turned out just great - fresh whipped cream and shaved chocolate on top.  Oh boy - really good.  A great ending to a mostly smooth day.

Also got to watch The Blind Side again - that was my movie of choice for Christmas night.  Such an uplifting movie - love that it is a mostly true story and I want to be Leanne Tuohey.  Hutsbah.  I love that about her (and that Sandra Bullock played her in the film).  Maybe tomorrow night we'll watch Marley and Me - I missed that one in the theatres, and Judy gave it to me for Christmas.

Nothing much witty to say, nothing much poignant or clever.  The main thing on my mind is how mad I am that my mom has Alzheimers and has slipped away from us bit by bit.  She cannot hold a coherent conversation, and she is just outright mean to my dad who is jumping through hoops to keep her with him as long as possible.  He knows how much closer the end is for his ability to care for her.  If I get started on the subject of Alzheimers' and how it is taxing my every last ounce of patience with my mom, I will start to get upset, and that would serve absolutely no purpose at all.

So, I'll just say Merry Christmas.  It was pleasant enough.  My dad was happy and he didn't have to cook today.  I loved that about today more than anything.

Two weeks

Measuring one's life by days and weeks seems like such a futile thing sometimes, but we all do it.  Counting down the moments instead of savoring them is the wrong way to be.  I've done it all of my life and if I really look back on it and think about the times I've willed (and wiled) away, it's kind of pitiful.

But I'm doing it again right now.  In the next two weeks, I've got more things to do than I want to, but once they are done, they can be checked off the list of perfunctory tasks and then I can get back to the business of living my life again for two more weeks.  That's kind of the point of this blog, I guess. 

Two more weeks of work - during which grades must be posted again, 56 pages of yearbook need to be built and shipped, 40 pages of corrected proofs done and returned, projects completed and graded, a newspaper distributed and critiqued and a third one planned.  And that's just the school stuff.  I also need to decorate for Christmas, wrap gifts (and finish purchasing them), bake cookies, attend Christmas parties, and prepare to go to Newport News for the holidays.  Yes.  Much to do. 

I want to enjoy it all - because I really do love Christmas time.  Today I was rummaging for the tree skirts, which is the official starting point of all of Christmas in my estimation - I never found them, but I did find numerous treasures that I have acquired over the year(s).  Some that I bought for gifts, some for myself, some that I have had forever, and it made me smile to think of what a good shopper and keeper of the stuff I am. 

I really do have a lot of stuff - especially wonderful Christmas stuff.  I wish I knew where it all was/is - and it is definitely here in this house because I don't get rid of anything.  I will have to completely rearrange the attic to bring the tree down, but the tree can't come down until I find the tree skirts. 

My very first tree skirt was this quilted round that I made my first year in Lancaster with edging.  I made dozens of them and sold them - they actually go "under" the tree stand, not around it - protecting the floor.  Then several years ago, I happened upon this perfect quilted Santa tree skirt the day after Christmas at Thalhimers - it was handmade and signed, the perfect size (slightly larger than the rounder I had made all those years ago) and I love it.  What a bargain, and it makes me smile every time I find it.  The rounder and the skirt are together - wherever they are, and it isn't time until I find them.

Then, I can do the window candles, put the tree in place and illuminate it.  Once that is done, I can haul the rest out of the attic.  But not until.

So, sometime in the next two weeks, all of this will magically happen, I will begin the journey through my Christmas rituals and preparations for the transformation that only lasts a short time.  I will enjoy it late into the night - sometimes I leave the lights on all night long.

Ahh.  The wonder of the holidays and what it means to so many people all over the world.  And in my little piece of it, my favorite is the twinkle of lights.